heorte: (rm00223 (2))
ellis ginsberg. ([personal profile] heorte) wrote in [community profile] faderift 2022-11-26 08:27 pm (UTC)

"Kinder. Not easy. There aren't easy deaths."

Having seen the ugliest ways a person might die, been on the administering end, burned the bodies, Ellis has found so little difference in that last moment. There is only the speed with which suffering might be ended, but even that moment of release—

How long had he been on the ground? An eternity and mere seconds all at once.

"It's done," is a dismissal. The opportunity afforded him is gone. It cannot be called back to him. (He has the memory of hands over his, slick with blood, keeping his fingers from the new seam at his throat.) "I'll do my duty, as long as I'm living."

That's the bargain, after all. He can do nothing else but honor it, no matter how much time had passed since he'd first struck it.

"Was that your only concern? My utility?"

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